Depressed? or sociopath?

I can't talk to a physiologist because i don't have any health care at this present time but would appreciate some input. A little about me: I'm about to get remarried to the love of my life a few years after a rough divorce and the death of a boyfriend shortly after the divorce. my ex husband and i continued to date after the divorce and death of my boyfriend and then moved out of state. My husband to be claims that i'm a sociopath because I apologize all the time and usually its for the same thing. But i enjoy using technicalities to justify my actions and apologies. I need help. We've been fighting a lot and its typically when i drink. I enjoy drinking but am becoming like less of a women more each day and more physically abusive when i drink. Is there some pent up depression from what i've shared or could i be a sociopath? please help!